TEN COMMANDMENTS TO HUSBANDS

Ten commandments for husbands
The Bible is God's "instruction manual" for happy living. There is no other book on earth that will bring about inner peace and eternal life than the bible. One thing that most men have in common is that they are married.
Unfortunately, because we live in an "amoral" (morally neutral) society, most who enter into marriage have little training. Isn't it bizarre that a doctor trains for 7 years, a teacher 4 but there is virtually no training for becoming a husband. You can't take a course in university that certifies you as a husband...the closest you can come is a "bachelors" degree.
Here are 10 principles from the word of God for husbands .
1:Thou shall not take thy wife for granted, but will honor and respect her as thy equal. (1 Pet 3:7)
Dear Husband, are you treating your wife as an equal and granting her your highest honor? If not God says he will not answer your prayers!
One of the worst things that happened to us in our African cultures is when it exalted men above measure.Our tradition nearly makes a man deputy to God but that is not so.We are all flesh and blood,just as our wives are.They have a duty from God to help us.God made a woman as a helper to man.That means,she needs to know your goals, aspirations, desires, plans for the future,your investments and its returns, and when given a chance to do what God intended her to do,as your helper,you will realize indeed God had man in mind,when he created a woman. Unfortunately,many men have crippled the woman in their lives and would rather not reveal any financial statements,any business deals or anything to their wives .They would rather trust their friends,business partners and relatives,than their wives. If you saw her the best among the many women,and married her,then trust her with all you have too and you will see how powerful your family will grow and glow with the beauty of God's glory,courtesy of her.
2:Thy highest allegiance, except God, shall be to thy wife, not thy relatives or friends. (Gen 2:24)
How often does the husband honor his blood family over his own wife?
Such is a recipe for disaster!
In-law problems are often the result of a husband who allows his mother and father to interfere in his relationship with his wife.
3: Thou shalt frequently tell thy wife how important & valuable she is to thee. (Phil 2:3; Prov 31:10-11)
In the Sleepless in Seattle (movie) Radio commentator asks a man who was missing his dead wife, "Tell me about your wife". "How many hours do you have?" Immediately 3000 single women jammed the radio station switchboard trying to get his number for a date! Why Because he was sincerely praising his wife! Why did they want to date a complete stranger? Because the one thing they knew was that this man possessed the rare quality of praising his female companion. If he did it for his former wife…he would do it for them!
Infact,it's Selfishness that kills a marriage.Whenever a man is consumed with himself more than his wife,thinks he is better than his wife,he will see no need to tell the wife how important she is to him.Husbands, tell your wife how important and valuable she is to you. Watch for the loving smile on her face when you do! The Proverbs writer said, "An excellent wife, who can find? For her worth is far above jewels. The heart of her husband trusts in her, And he will have no lack of gain."[ Prov 31:10-11]. Notice how the wise husband trusts his wife's judgments and realizes how fortunate he is to have her.
NB:
What every man should know is that God gave women the authority to make important decisions too:
-They are workers in and managers of the home:
-1 Ti 5:14: (Greek: oijkodespotevw "to rule/manage the house")
-Tit 2:5 (Greek: oikodespotes literally, "house ruler")
-A wife's judgment can be better than her husbands: Nabal & Abigail: 1 Sam 25:3,17,25,32
4:Thou shalt hold thy wife's love by the same means that thou won it. (SOS 5:10-16)
Men pursue their future bride with doting ceaseless attention. Once married the husband views marriage as a goal accomplished to add unto other of life's challenges. He then gives his ceaseless doting attention to the job, the boys or anything but his wife. The wife on the other hand, viewed marriage not as a goal met, but as the beginning of a relationship. She viewed his doting attention as a down payment of attentions to come. He viewed it as a means to merely get her to say "I DO".
When this this guy really WON the love of his future wife,he looked good because he groomed his appearance for her. He smelled good, because he regularly bathed and gargled. And he spoke words of "sweetness" to his love. But give many husbands a few years of marriage and they let their appearance and hygiene slip. But worst of all the sweetness towards their wife is gone . The wife proclaims to her friends, "Did he ever change after we said 'I do'!" Guys, if you want the nights to be hot, you best start warming up your wife in the day with words of kindness and if possible, buy your wife flowers on a regular basis.
5:Thou shalt actively establish family discipline with thy wife's help. (2 Timothy 3:15; Ephesians 6:4; Deuteronomy 6:6-9)
Few would argue that the wife is the primary parent involved in the daily task of interacting with the children. But God has placed the father as the head of the household and that means that you must work hard along side your wife in establishing family discipline.
Many fathers leave the majority of the work of raising the kids up to the wife. In child custody cases, the mother almost always get control of the kids, not because she is a better parent, but because she is the one who has been most involved with them. The bible says"And, fathers, do not provoke your children to anger; but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord."Ephesians 6:4 .
You must be directly involved with your children. And then be careful not to "provoke" them to anger, because you have not really taken the time to understand exactly what happened and why. Some fathers alienate their children because they hastily dish out too harsh a punishment because they want to get back to their TV show or reading the paper. To these husbands, children are an interruption imposed upon him by the wife. Sad indeed. Train up a child in the way he should go, even when he is old he will not depart from it. Prov 22:6
6:Thou shalt remember to do all the little things for thy wife when you say you will. (Mt 5:37)
1.Jesus instructs all Christians, "let your statement be, 'Yes, yes' or 'No, no' and anything beyond these is of evil." Mt 5:37. Husbands, when you say you will do something for your wife, have the consideration to do it! Why should she justifiably nag you? Your wife shouldn't have to get you to sign some binding oath to get you to make the bed, take out the garbage or take her out to dinner as you agreed. By doing what you say you will earn her trust in other areas.
7: Thou shall Keep thine eyes on thy own wife, not thy neighbors. (Prov 5:15-20; Job 31:1; Jer 5:8)
The Proverbs writer says it this way, "Drink water from your own cistern, And fresh water from your own well... Let her breasts satisfy you at all times; Be exhilarated always with her love." Prov 5:15-20
-The ultimate sacrifice that a woman makes in child bearing is her figure. And the media is filled with 17 year old models who are not yet graduated high school and never done a hard days work in their life! It's easy to get the attention of such but Job was wise when he said, "I made a covenant with my eyes not to look with lust at a young woman.?" [Job 31:1]
Unfortunately,to many men, the words of Jeremiah apply, "They were well-fed lusty horses, Each one neighing after his neighbor's wife." [Jer 5:8]
8:Thou shall make every effort to see things from your wife's point of view. (Gen 21:12)
Abraham is a man whose wife actually called him "lord". Sarah had an insight on a personal family matter and Abraham felt that she was wrong. "But God said to Abraham, "Do not be distressed because of the lad [Ishmael]and your maid[hagah]; whatever Sarah tells you, listen to her" [Gen 21:12.]
Dear husband, Did you catch that? God told Abraham to obey his wife! He had not taken the time to see things from her point of view. Husbands and wives often live and think in different worlds. A wise husband will "listen" to his wife before God steps in and forces him to to what his wife has said.Always listen to your wife before God steps in to force you
Live with her in an understanding way since she is a woman" [1 Pe 3:7 ]
9:Thou shall not fail to kiss thy wife every morning. (SOS 8:1)
Do you know why the "kiss and ride" commuter drop off area's are so popular in some western countries? Just ask the wives who drop off their husbands for work.One TV program documented that the wives loved it. Here they had a "legitimate" reason to expect a kiss from their husband every-morning.
Husband, when you leave the house for work, give her a kiss. When you come home, tell her you love her and give her another kiss. Here, in the Song of Solomon, a future wife speaks of her love and desire for a kiss. "If I found you outdoors, I would kiss you; No one would despise me, either." [Sos 8:1]
10:Thou shalt not be stingy with thy wife when it comes to money. (Esther 5:3)
King Ahasuerus was married to Queen Esther. Look how generous he was with his wife! He said to her, "What is troubling you, Queen Esther? And what is your request? Even to half of the kingdom it will be given to you." Esther 5:3
Now in modern marriage law, many might wonder why this man is being praised for giving his wife the half that already belonged to her. However, back then this was an incredible offer of generosity! How many wives have to grovel and beg for a few dollars from their husbands while he lavishly spends on himself.Don't be stingy to the one you chose as your wife,among the 3 billion plus women on planet earth today.Let her not pray to God to touch you before you give her any cash.Make it your personal desire to give her cash even when she has not asked for it. Godly women rarely spend on this outside their home and when you give her the ability to use your cash,it brings returns back to your marriage.
Invest in your marriage.God bless you